Tuesday, May 2, 2017

I Can't Find My Comfort Food

Nothing is right at this moment. Neither chocolate, nor ice cream, can fix it. I have been binge-eating anything, I thought, that can make my mood lifts up a little bit. Raffel's Roast Beef and Cheese Sandwich didn't manage. McDonald's plain Cheeseburger for dinner, then ended with its' newly released Apple Pie, certainly didn't help. GODIVA's dark chocolate was a bummer. A pile of rice and a piece of fried chicken from a nearby warteg was a failure. Man, it got to the point of me questioning, "What exactly is my comfort food?".

To my knowledge, a comfort food is something that you eat to help you ease down whatever anxiety, or bad mood, that you are having at the moment. Most people relate comfort food with dessert, like ice cream, or banana split, or ice cream sundae. But, then again, I believe people differs from one another and that each person has his, or her, own comfort food.

Five years ago, I thought it was Dunkin Donuts' Hot Cocoa that helps me keep my sanity in one place. I remembered it was the last day of the National Examination and that the result will be announced in one month. I couldn't keep myself together, afraid that I might flunk my tests, so I stuffed myself with the bittersweet Hot Cocoa of the donut shop.

Then, when I hit rock bottom a few years later, I visited Nanny's Pavilion for its' various selections of waffles and decided to settle with Howie's Banana Fudge Waffle. The cold and sweet ice cream went well with the crispy golden brown waffle that boosted my mood in a snap of a finger. But, then it quickly went away as I had my last bite of the waffle.

A month ago, on a certain rainy day, I went back to Nanny's Pavilion and had me Bob's Buffalo Chicken Wings to ease the anxiety. It made me feel good for a while, though it lasted a bit longer than the waffles.

I keep having changes regarding my comfort food through out the year and it makes me quite confuse. Do people have only one comfort food, that can instantly make them go from Portishead's Gloomy Sunday to American Author's Best Day of My Life in a flash? Or does comfort food varies from time to time, depending on the person's mood?

I wish I have this one particular food that can never fail me every time I'm having a bad day, you know? Like, Jessica Davis and her Monet's Hot Chocolate, or Carrie Bradshaw and her fabulous glass of Cosmopolitan, or the simplicity of a sandwich to Joey. Is it too much to ask? But, then again, all of them are characters from a fictional tv series. Meh. 

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